How to Live Fabulously!

A lot of people frequently compliment me on the way I live; my personal style, my hair, my makeup, and my home decor. I think that in a lot of ways people often look up to people they see on YouTube or on the internet and imagine that those people are somehow different from themselves because they have this wonderful style or own a lot of lovely things. But the truth, as I know it, is that the only thing that makes me different from you, is the choices that I make in the way I choose to live my life. So, today, I wanted to let you all in on a little secret of mine, and share with you the set of rules that I live by in my own life that help me to feel fabulous and live fabulously! Now, I’m not sharing this information with you in the hopes that you will follow these rules and suddenly turn into me, instead, I am hoping you understand this information, and put it to practice in your own life to become the most fabulous version of yourself possible, because being you and being the most amazing version of you possible, is probably the most amazing thing you can do for yourself, and for the whole wide world!

1. Define your style and stick to it 90% of the time!

I wasn’t always a stylish dresser. I went to private school most of my life and by the time I was in college, I had no clue how to dress myself without a uniform! It took me years to figure out what personal style meant, and often times, I feel like I am still figuring it out, but I made a decision a few years ago to define what my style was going to be and to only buy pieces that fit within those parameters. I chose the colors I looked best in, the overall style that I was trying to convey, and the price range that I was willing to spend within for my clothing. In the beginning, I would often make lists of clothing items that I needed in my wardrobe. Things like a great little black dress, or a pair of comfortable nude pumps. I basically blueprinted the wardrobe and got to work on building it. It has been years and I am still working on the list to an extent, but now, I have become more skilled in my own style so I no longer need to refer to a list to determine what I need to buy. Now, I say that you should stick to your style 90% of the time because if you are anything like me, you may want to experiment. I think experimentation with your style is great, but I caution moderation in this department because when you start experimenting too much you deviate from the style your trying to establish. Just know its okay to take a little risk, but make sure your only doing it in small doses for things you’re really excited about.

2. Acquire furnishings one curated piece at a time.

My home is probably one of the elements of my life that I am most proud of. Whenever I have guests over, they are always surprised at how nicely my home is decorated and the types of quality, timeless pieces I own. From the time that I lived in my first apartment, I have been collecting furnishings piece by piece that align with my personal style and the overall feel I want for my home. I never buy anything for my home that I don’t absolutely love or that I don’t have a permanent home for. Gradually, I have collected pieces like my prized tufted settee and my gorgeous upholstered bed, and I continue to collect items for my home that will continue to perpetuate my overall style and add to the luxury I desire in my life.

3. Spend your money on the things that matter to you.

Some people love expensive dinners, some people like expensive toys, everyone is different and neither are right or wrong. People often comment that I own a lot of high quality accessories and gadgets, its true, I do! I’m not a millionaire, but I choose to spend my money on the things that matter to me. This means that I spend less money in other areas of my life that I don’t care too much about. For example, my car. My husband and I own one single car between us. We could own two, but one is all we need, so we make it work. The car isn’t anything fancy, technically is a crossover SUV, but it’s american made and was purchased as a certified pre-owned vehicle. Some people are more into cars than they are gadgets, and might buy a second car for their family or buy a luxury model brand new, but that isn’t the way I choose to spend my money, so I don’t spend it that way. Now, I am not trying to tell you how to spend your money, except to say that you should spend it on things that matter to you and forget about the rest. Your life isn’t made fabulous by other people’s definitions, it’s made fabulous by your own!

4. Be picky, it’s a good thing!

On that same vein of spending your money on things that matter to you, I also advise that you start getting more picky with the way you spend not only your money, but also your time. We all have things that we have to do, and things that we have to buy or spend money on, but we also have a good amount that’s up to us. I find that I like to be picky when it comes to how I spend my time and how I spend my money because those are the two most important things we have in life. A lot of living fabulously is about narrowing down what a fabulous life looks like to us. Some people want to travel the world, some people want a lovely home and to spend as much time there as possible. Some people like to try new experiences and some like quiet evenings with friends. No matter what it is you like to do, get picky about it. Start holding yourself to a higher standard of living. Remember, having it all is a relative concept. It’s not about literally having every single option available, it’s about having those few things that really make you happy. Start figuring out what those few things are and be super picky with everything else because you have a limited amount of time in life so you have to draw your line in the sand for how to spend it!

5. Be a wonderful person

Being outgoing doesn’t always come naturally to me. I know it doesn’t come naturally to many people, and I think there is this misconception that you have to be an outgoing person for people to like you and think you’re wonderful. I don’t think that’s it. I think that the most wonderful people, the people who you always remember, and the people who you want to be around are the nice ones. The ones that always have positive things to say and never bother with the negative. These are the people who are friendly to strangers and kind to those around them. Sometimes, this sort of behavior can be hard for us to achieve, it means forgiving the world as soon as it hurts you and getting over that pain before it starts. It really is true that you never know what struggles those around you are facing and so you should always show them kindness. If someone cuts you off at an intersection, say a prayer for them that they make it home safe. If someone cuts in front of you in a line, just smile and nod at them. Others can only upset you if you let them, and if you live with this sort of kindness in your heart and in your mind, nothing will ever hurt you. You will find that those around you will love you deeper and show you more kindness than you could ever expect. All because you are a wonderful person.

6. Put yourself first!

There is this major misconception floating around the world that says if you don’t put others before yourself you are a selfish person. This makes absolutely no sense. If you are not taking care of yourself first and foremost, how then can you take care of others properly? This subject always makes me think about one perfect example that illustrates the point. When you’re flying in an airplane, going over the emergency procedures, there is always a part about using your oxygen mask in the event of an emergency. The directions always tell you, point-blank, to secure your own mask before attempting to help anyone else around you! Why? Because you can’t really help anyone else if you’re still in imminent danger. The same goes in daily life. If you’re not putting your own needs, like personal hygiene, health and wellbeing first, there is no way you’re going to be able to do much good for others and people don’t like to be around others who don’t seem to have their shit straight, so get your shit straight and put yourself first so you can help other people get their shit straight! Thus adding to the fabulousness of the world as a whole!

So, that’s it! Those are my top secret tips for living a fabulous life! I hope you can take something from this and evaluate how these “rules” apply to you in your own life. Remember, it’s not about being more like me or someone else out there that you think has a fabulous life, it’s about making small but impactful changes in your own life to make yours more fabulous! Seriously, being the best version of yourself is a gift you give back to the world, so get to it!